Children with autism tend to have anxiety issues, these anxiety issues present themselves in various ways, from behavioural to O.C.D. (Obsessive compulsive disorder). However, unlike children with only O.C.D., who are tortured by there repetitive thoughts and consequential repetitive behaviours, like washing their hands 25 times, autistic children are comforted by repetitive behaviours. If anyone is unsure if there child is autistic or O.C.D. there is a great article here http://drbowers.wordpress.com/2009/10/20/autism-and-ocd-in-children/ .
Holden certainly has O.C.D. tendencies, that are probably brought on by the stress and anxiety of not being able to express his brilliant mind and deep emotions that everyone who knows him, knows he possess. For the most part, these tendencies do not really get in the way of his everyday life (mine and Zane’s lives, well that’s something else). However they do make for some interesting issues. For instance, Holden quite recently has begun to have a morning constitution, that seems to occur right before the bus is going to show up to take him to school. Recently, ever the conversationalist, he expressed my most feared word at 6:15am “Poop?”. The tough part here is that Holden often uses “poop” as an excuse not to do something, like say brush his teeth.. So I have to ask, “Holden, do you have to poop”, he will answer either “no” and find his next excuse not to brush his teeth like “shower?”, or answer “yes”.
So on this particularly fine morning Holden answered “yes”. When Holden uses the restroom, he demonstrates, without a doubt, that he is his grandfather's grandson, and his Uncle Daniel’s nephew. If Holden read the paper, he would take the paper into the bathroom with him. Here’s the problem, Holden’s bus is scheduled to arrive at 6:30am, I am asked by the transportation company to have him outside and waiting by 6:25am. If it were Zane needing to use the restroom, no problem, he would be in and out in 2 minutes max. So Holden finishes his business in pretty good time, he has missed the bus probably 3 times this year, for this reason, which on a work day requires me to take him to work with me, then take him to school at 8am, and that experience is a whole blog post on it’s own. So I rush him to get his clothes back on and out to the bus. Here is when his O.C.D. tendencies start to drive me crazy, he has to put the seat down, before he flush the toilet. Then we get in the hall and start to head for the door, but the bedroom door is a jar, and he has to close that before he will proceed. I grab his arm and start assisting him in his efforts to get outside. When we get to kitchen, I make the mistake of guiding him through a chair that is pulled out, he jerks his arm, and begins to make his “I am going to melt down sounds”, I ask him “What?” and he says “Chair”. Now we have to cross back across the room, walk on the inside of the chair, then push the chair in, and walk on the outside of the chair. We make it out to the garage, where he now has to close the garage door using the keypad, and I have to tell him each digit of the code, while he searches for them. I am pretty sure he knows the numbers, he just likes me to say them too him. As the garage door closes, the bus pulls up. Home free right? not really. As I put him on the bus, he starts to get upset again and says "video". Holden likes to take things to school for comfort, like a security blanket. For him it can be a calculator, a video, a wireless mouse. You never really know, and his teacher is fine with him bring them to school, and Holden is very good about leaving them in his backpack. So I tell him I’ll get one, if he allows the driver to strap him in. I sprint up the drive, reopen the garage door, run through the house, fetch a video, run back and put it in his backpack. Now he is happy and ready for school, empty bowls, and with his video of the day. I, am totally stressed, out of breath, and still need to get to work.
The whole point of this story, was to set up another story. Yesterday when I got home, and relieved the nanny of her duties, Holden started to freak out. Katie, Holden’s nanny, tells me that he has been obsessing on closing her door on her truck. I express to Holden that it is time for Katie to go, but he expresses to me he wants to go outside, and doesn’t care that I don’t want him to go outside barefoot. Deciding to pick my battles wisely, and being tired from work, I humor him. So we walk out together, Katie unlocks the truck by remote, Holden walks up to the passenger door, opens it, then closes it, and walks happily back to the house with me.
I could have pushed the issue, and he would have gotten upset, but probably not had a melt down. But to see Holden made happy so easily, sometimes I give in. Of course there are things I have to insist on, and he can be anything from mildly upset, to having a full on melt down, but that is life with Holden. =)
Holden certainly has O.C.D. tendencies, that are probably brought on by the stress and anxiety of not being able to express his brilliant mind and deep emotions that everyone who knows him, knows he possess. For the most part, these tendencies do not really get in the way of his everyday life (mine and Zane’s lives, well that’s something else). However they do make for some interesting issues. For instance, Holden quite recently has begun to have a morning constitution, that seems to occur right before the bus is going to show up to take him to school. Recently, ever the conversationalist, he expressed my most feared word at 6:15am “Poop?”. The tough part here is that Holden often uses “poop” as an excuse not to do something, like say brush his teeth.. So I have to ask, “Holden, do you have to poop”, he will answer either “no” and find his next excuse not to brush his teeth like “shower?”, or answer “yes”.
So on this particularly fine morning Holden answered “yes”. When Holden uses the restroom, he demonstrates, without a doubt, that he is his grandfather's grandson, and his Uncle Daniel’s nephew. If Holden read the paper, he would take the paper into the bathroom with him. Here’s the problem, Holden’s bus is scheduled to arrive at 6:30am, I am asked by the transportation company to have him outside and waiting by 6:25am. If it were Zane needing to use the restroom, no problem, he would be in and out in 2 minutes max. So Holden finishes his business in pretty good time, he has missed the bus probably 3 times this year, for this reason, which on a work day requires me to take him to work with me, then take him to school at 8am, and that experience is a whole blog post on it’s own. So I rush him to get his clothes back on and out to the bus. Here is when his O.C.D. tendencies start to drive me crazy, he has to put the seat down, before he flush the toilet. Then we get in the hall and start to head for the door, but the bedroom door is a jar, and he has to close that before he will proceed. I grab his arm and start assisting him in his efforts to get outside. When we get to kitchen, I make the mistake of guiding him through a chair that is pulled out, he jerks his arm, and begins to make his “I am going to melt down sounds”, I ask him “What?” and he says “Chair”. Now we have to cross back across the room, walk on the inside of the chair, then push the chair in, and walk on the outside of the chair. We make it out to the garage, where he now has to close the garage door using the keypad, and I have to tell him each digit of the code, while he searches for them. I am pretty sure he knows the numbers, he just likes me to say them too him. As the garage door closes, the bus pulls up. Home free right? not really. As I put him on the bus, he starts to get upset again and says "video". Holden likes to take things to school for comfort, like a security blanket. For him it can be a calculator, a video, a wireless mouse. You never really know, and his teacher is fine with him bring them to school, and Holden is very good about leaving them in his backpack. So I tell him I’ll get one, if he allows the driver to strap him in. I sprint up the drive, reopen the garage door, run through the house, fetch a video, run back and put it in his backpack. Now he is happy and ready for school, empty bowls, and with his video of the day. I, am totally stressed, out of breath, and still need to get to work.
The whole point of this story, was to set up another story. Yesterday when I got home, and relieved the nanny of her duties, Holden started to freak out. Katie, Holden’s nanny, tells me that he has been obsessing on closing her door on her truck. I express to Holden that it is time for Katie to go, but he expresses to me he wants to go outside, and doesn’t care that I don’t want him to go outside barefoot. Deciding to pick my battles wisely, and being tired from work, I humor him. So we walk out together, Katie unlocks the truck by remote, Holden walks up to the passenger door, opens it, then closes it, and walks happily back to the house with me.
I could have pushed the issue, and he would have gotten upset, but probably not had a melt down. But to see Holden made happy so easily, sometimes I give in. Of course there are things I have to insist on, and he can be anything from mildly upset, to having a full on melt down, but that is life with Holden. =)
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